The Abandonment Wound Healing Course

In this E-course You Will Discover How to…

A Word from Course Creator & Facilitator Jeff Brown

We live in a world that is dominated by an unresolved abandonment wound. It is the Mother (and Father) of all wounds, a super-wound with a great many tributaries and manifestations, so all-pervasive that it is often difficult to recognize in the midst of our overwhelming lives. It is a silent pandemic, a hidden nexus where all of our other wounds gather. As adults in this fast-paced society, we are expected to be highly functional and to hold it all together. The moment the abandonment wound raises its head, we push it back down. After all, we are supposed to be grown up now. Abandonment issues are for children. And yet, our tender woundedness continues to stir beneath the surface, and impacts many aspects of our lives. 

That’s the thing about the abandonment wound. We can imagine it something very specific, a singular issue… in and of itself, but it is often so much more than that. It is often a self-perpetuating way of being, one that cuts so deep, and was felt so early in our lives, that it often influences every part of our lives: our thinking, our emotional body, our physical well-being, our notions of meaning and directionality, our relationship choices and behaviors, our sense of security in our own skin and in the world itself. In short, there is very little in our lives that cannot be impacted by an unresolved abandonment wound.  

I had been wanting to write something that is focused on the healing of the abandonment wound for many years. It was impossible when I was first overwhelmed by the wound triggers as a young adult, both because it was all I could do to survive the feelings, and because I had no understanding of what on earth was happening inside of me. At that time, I had only questions, and no answers… What are these strange and uncomfortable feelings? Why am I feeling so flooded and overcome with pain? How have I carried this pain for so long, without knowing? Where are these primal triggers coming from? Why am I suddenly feeling so unsafe in the world? And, where do I find comfort and refuge? 

It took me some years, before I finally went into therapy to fully confront and excavate this wound. And, despite my best efforts (and their best efforts), I had a very difficult time finding a therapist who knew how to work with it. They could acknowledge it, and analyze its roots, but very few knew how to get into the heart of the material, and work it through. It was almost as though this wound was too hot to touch. It was a hyper-trigger, a super-wound with a multitude of manifestations. It felt safer to try to contain and manage it, than to actually attempt to heal it within the body itself. 

And so, through much trial and error, I developed my own healing system of tools and techniques. Both with respect to working with the wound directly, and also with respect to developing a series of practices that helped to strengthen my self-love muscle and bridge my inner adult with my inner child. This work was especially necessary, because my abandonment wound was intertwined with other immobilizing issues, particularly one I call the “JAB—the Jealousy, Abandonment and Betrayal” trigger triad. When the JAB trigger flared up, it was immobilizing, and nearly impossible to feel functional and safe in the world. If I wanted to remedy it, I had to approach it from every possible angle.  

This course reflects the substantial toolbox of techniques and practices that I developed on my road to recovery. It was no easy feat, but I have been able to reach a place where the abandonment wound no longer subconsciously or consciously dominates my life. I have a much stronger sense of self, and I am capable of developing and sustaining healthy relationships in every part of my life. I feel enlivened, self-assured, and emblazoned with purpose. You can, too. 

If I have a wish for you with respect to this course, it is that you arrive at the end of it feeling more deeply aware of where this wound lives inside of you, clearer on how it shows up and limits your possibilities, and that you are well on the path to healing it. If you can stay with the work for long enough, the voices of internalized shame and self-hatred will grow quieter, and a voice of self-love will rise up to occupy space inside of you. Your internal narrative will shift from one that is predicated on the fear of abandonment to one that is predicated on a sense of your own value. You will no longer make choices sourced in an over-compensatory quest for external validation. You will make choices that are rooted in a healthy self-love.

At no point in this course do I attempt to tell you how to feel, or to take over your process. Instead, I seek to provide tools, techniques, and insights that can support your own unique process. And to provide a safe container for your healing and transformation journey. Please join me.